How much is too much?


“Selfish”, according to the Cambridge dictionary it means, “caring only about what you want or need without any thought for the needs or wishes of other people

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Ever wondered what makes a person selfish? Is it the upbringing? or the zodiac? Are we born this way or experiences of life makes us this way?

Being a Cancerian, my zodiac makes me to be an emotional, sensitive and extremely family valued person. These are my personality traits or so they say? Well guess what? Whether we believe in our horoscope or not, I am like that. Do I like that part about me? No, absolutely not. But.. would I want to change that? I am conflicted.. Most often we tend to think with our hearts than our minds. Maybe this piece is an outburst of my emotions but is the wrong way of being? Absolutely not. People are designed to be flawed. Every human comes with their own sets of positives and negatives, sometimes more of the positives and less of the negatives and sometimes more of both and sometimes we just don’t understand what is happening.

But does my nature of being emotional and sensitive directly imply towards a selfless trait? Not at all. No human is born with an exact set of traits. We grow up to see behaviour of people around us. and as fate would have it. I am a typical Cancerian. I feel too hard, I cry a little hard, I smile even harder. And because of that, I tend towards putting others needs before mine. Does that make me selfless? Or does that make me overtly involved? Intruding ones own personal space? That is the con of being emotional. You don’t understand how much is too much. But should we apologise for putting others needs before ours?

The brain is a mecca of conflicted thoughts, we are always at the crossroads of what is right and what is wrong, will it work or will it not? Am I doing just enough or is it too much?

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Caring too much is what I am good at. Now it is both a good quality and a bad one, and I am unapologetic about it. It gives the strength to love someone fearlessly and create a sense of being my own. So does that mean, if i care about someone too much I would expect the same of them? Consciously, no.. Subconsciously, HELL YES! Human beings are a sucker for love care and protection, some love to get back in return and some just love and care, because they feel like it.

But it still fails to answer all the conflicted thoughts of the mind.. Will we ever know about it?

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